Goodbye for now 

I asked my mom and dad to make sure that no matter what, no matter how I felt and no matter whether I could type this out or not, to make me publish this blog entry.  My father can say for me that since my passing was not predicted, I didn’t know that this would be my final past. Being cooped up at sloan for six months, I planned for every eventuality. I do let my father speak for me here because we talked about every possibility for my future.  This is my Plan B preface to what I thought was my next post in case it was my last.

It’s not like I never thought I might be leaving you for a long time, and I did voice to my parents only a couple of times that I was scared I might never never see them again, and that as nutty as this sounds that I feared missing my parents, brother, and sister more than anything. I didn’t want them to see that too much.   I’m no hero. I rarely showed my deepest fears because it was bad enough to see how my parents looked when it seemed like I had a good chance.  To cause them pain by my upset would be to face a guilt even Sweet Brown would say “I ain’t got  time for dat”. So this was to be my plan B preface to my last blog “just in case, ever the ” “pessimist planner.”   May It serve as a loving goodbye by all those whose lives touched me.  You know who you are.  I’m sorry I didn’t have the time to get to do that, but the good news is that I never thought I wouldn’t get the chamce.  And this preface proves that ultimately I did.  

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